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It is an unsustainable (but not purposeless) relationship-form in the long term, meant to lead you to depend on a heavenly Father who cares for you, and promises to provide for you, regardless of your relationship status or prospects.

But uncertainty is a mercy, if we’re prepared to receive it — it reveals to us the tensions of life itself, especially when we can’t sit still long enough to listen. Life in the midst of “We do not know” (John 14:5) and “You know” (Psalm 139:4) can, at times, feel like we’re fastened to a torture rack — pulled between a big God and real life.

” How does one practice vulnerability without any security, any promises, any covenant?

How does one react to anxiety in the relationship without always becoming defensive? Each of us is left with a basic question: How does the grace of Christ meet us in the midst of emotionally charged, often over-spiritualized, life-encompassing performance anxiety?

We are tempted to earn and secure love by our own power, and tempted to test others’ worthiness for our love.

And yet we have a God who passionately endorses marriage as the norm for people, and is actively seeking to bless us.

Why does exclusive dating so often leave us undone?When couples move past the awkward first-date phase of a relationship, many face a new and unsettling tension between strong romantic feelings and the reality that they are not yet married.They ask themselves, “What does a relationship look like with someone who is neither my spouse nor my fiancé?Indulging in anxiety in a dating relationship is like indulging in back-seat driving: It only makes everyone else more nervous and annoyed and doesn’t actually contribute anything positive.Yet, the experience is legitimate and real, and so is the fear. To know how Jesus Christ is relevant to our situation in dating, we must first of all come to terms with the often avoided, but very obvious reality, that we are not safe in a relationship.

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